Calling You, by alternative rock band Blue October, is an anthem to obsessive love. It holds one of my favorite lyrics in any love song: I can’t believe you actually picked me. This song came to be popular in the early 00’s but I identify with it as coming to be during the beginnings of my relationship with Chris. Both of us were damaged in some way but found peace with one another, finding friendship and love amidst the tumult. (Take away the old, show me the new, And I feel like I can fly when I stand next to you.....Only wanna see if you’re okay when I’m not around. Asking if you love me. I love the way you make it sound.) If we were to have gone with a traditional ‘first dance’ at our wedding, I’d have seen if there were a slower version of this song to hold him and sway, while whispering the words in his ear, because I still can’t believe he actually picked me.
From the historical writing archive. Original date: November 19, 2016. Recovered from local source material; editorial review is still in progress.